No Dessert Until You Finish Your Vegetables
Without rules, the basics in life would never get accomplished. I’ve had to institute this—let’s call it a guideline since, if it were a rule, I’d break it almost every day: no puzzle until you read the rest of the Times. Otherwise, I’d fail in my goal to be a well-informed citizen.
Today, for example. Had I launched right in on solving the crossword, I’d be out of the loop on key stories: former Republican senator Fred Thompson is cleaving to the party line by arguing against the release of John Roberts’s official memoranda (“National Report,” p. A16); “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” continues to do better box office than “Wedding Crashers” and “Fantastic Four” (“Arts, Briefly,” p. E2); and Anita Askienazy knew not only one or two but THREE people on the 79th Street cross-town bus (“Metropolitan Diary,” p. B2).
And now my reward. Too bad the crossword is as Lite as the rest of the paper, since Mondays are historically the slowest news day of the week. I understand the internal logic of making the puzzle progressively harder as the week goes on, but the news gets more voluminous, and substantive, over the course of the week, too. The net result is that there’s not enough time in the day to get through the Friday paper, and most Mondays it’s not worth buying the thing in the first place.
There. I’ve finally found a strong rationale to buy the New York Post.
Today, for example. Had I launched right in on solving the crossword, I’d be out of the loop on key stories: former Republican senator Fred Thompson is cleaving to the party line by arguing against the release of John Roberts’s official memoranda (“National Report,” p. A16); “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” continues to do better box office than “Wedding Crashers” and “Fantastic Four” (“Arts, Briefly,” p. E2); and Anita Askienazy knew not only one or two but THREE people on the 79th Street cross-town bus (“Metropolitan Diary,” p. B2).
And now my reward. Too bad the crossword is as Lite as the rest of the paper, since Mondays are historically the slowest news day of the week. I understand the internal logic of making the puzzle progressively harder as the week goes on, but the news gets more voluminous, and substantive, over the course of the week, too. The net result is that there’s not enough time in the day to get through the Friday paper, and most Mondays it’s not worth buying the thing in the first place.
There. I’ve finally found a strong rationale to buy the New York Post.
posted by DO at 10:32 AM
8 Comments:
If I made myself read the rest of the paper before doing the puzzle, the puzzle would never get done! Why punish yourself?
I'm a compulsive pack rat (to put it nicely) who insists on reading things (or at least looking them them) before throwing them away. So for years, I had piles of old newspapers cluttering my apartment. The fear of fire overcame the compulsion to read everything, and finally the papers got tossed. I no longer get the physical Times or any other paper.
Now I just have huge piles of old (and new) magazines to read. Eventually I'll be a well-informed citizen of the '90s.
(This doesn't technically apply to the Times puzzle anyway, since I've been a test solver since 1996 and do the puzzle independent of the rest of the paper.)
And speaking of dessert, my recently widowed mother decided that life is short, and why be unhappy: she now eats ice cream and cake for most meals when home. Luckily, I was well-trained long ago and love vegetables. But shhh, don't tell my young nephews!
I think you need a new rule. How about you can't do the crossword until you update your blog? Screw being a well-informed citizen.
It's a Catch-22, though: I'd have nothing to blog about until I do the puzzle.
Um, yesterday's puzzle?
Another option: Do the puzzle first, blog about it quickly, then see if you still feel strongly about getting well-informed. Hey, even if you skipped all the news, the crosswords still fill you in on a lot—remember the recent WMARKFELT entry? And the Pope Benedict special? Just ask Will Shortz to squeeze more hard news into the clues, and we can get one-stop shopping.
As the poet wrote (almost):
It is difficult
to get the news from crossword puzzles
yet men die miserably every day
for lack
of what is found there.
Let me tell you, doing the crossword in the New York Post will sap your will to live. If you must buy a conservative rag for your crossword fix, at least make it the Sun.
Oh God, I wouldn't dream of doing the puzzles in the Post. Especially the cryptic. I do not speak British. And, not to sound piously liberal or anything, I wouldn't turn to it for news, either. I gladly part with my 25 cents purely for the trash value. As guilty pleasures go, you can't get a better bang for your quarter of a buck.
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